Refining Manners

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
الحـمد لله والصلاة والسلام على رسول الله وعلى آلـه وصحبه ومن والاه

.

Allah, the Most High ﷻ Said in praise of His Messenger ﷺ:

وَإِنَّكَ لَعَلَىٰ خُلُقٍ عَظِيمٍ

“And verily, you are on an exalted standard of character.”

[Al-Qalam, 4]

The exalted character and adab mentioned in this Ayah was interpreted by Ibn ‘Abbas and Mujahid to mean “the Deen”. It is as if Allah is Saying (you are upon the great Deen of Islam, in which all good manners are included). See the Tafseer of at-Tabari.

Greatness of manners define one’s level of faith and strength of character; as the Prophet ﷺ said:

‏أحسن الناس خلقا

“Best of people (are those with best) character.” [Agreed upon]

He ﷺ also said in guiding towards perfection of faith:

أكمل المؤمنين إيمانا أحسنهم خلقا

“From the completeness (and perfection) of the believers emaan is having best of manners…”

[Abi Daw’ud, 4682 & others; At-Tirmidhi and ibn Hibban said the chain was authentic (see also ”Saheeh al-Jaami, 1230)]

Ibn Uthaymeen رحمه ﷲ commented in his ‘Sharh of Riyadus-Saliheen’ that from assuming good manners with Allah necessitates showing satisfaction with what He has made unlawful for the believers, as well as being content with what He has granted them or withheld from them.

Assuming good manners with other people necessitates having patience with them at all times and dealing with them justly even when dealt with unjustly. To carry oneself calmly and with dignity, and not be distracted by any of their disparagement or annoyance etc. (see his chapter on ‘Al-Wassiyatu ban-Nisaa’).

Crafting one’s character and refining one’s manners indeed reflects the entire being of a Muslim through which one’s Islam is measured. And perhaps it is for this reason Imam Ibn al-Qayyim رحمه ﷲ wrote in his ‘Madaarij al-Salikeen (2/307):

الدين كله خلق . فمن زاد عليك في الخلق زاد عليك في الدين

“The entire Deen is (about having) good manners, so whoever exceeds you in good manners, has exceeded you in the Deen.”

May Allah grant us exceptional manners worthy of being Muslim. Ameen.

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See also:

Displaying Good Examples

Book of Good Manners

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